What did the Frumwald say when asked to clean the house?

Looks like we got a lot of work to do. Now, clean the living room then shut all the remaining doors.

What did the Frumwald say when trying to calm the passengers of a sinking vessel?

When you get right down to it, death is just life's big refund.

What did the Frumwald say when asked what is a Frumwald?

If you have to ask then you probably don't know.

What did the Frumwald say when the Swiss government banned mustaches on Thursdays?

Oh, that's ridiculous! Why not Fridays?

What did the Frumwald say when given the choice between a life of solitary confinement or abrupt castration?

That's a tough one. It doesn't look like I'll be using it either way.

What did the Frumwald say when robbed at porcupine quill?

I see you've got a point.

What did the Frumwald say when he met the president?

Hey, aren't you the jerk that runs this place?

What did the Frumwald say when placed upside down in a barrel and sent over a waterfall?

This is inhumane! The blasted barrel's empty! Where's my booze?

What did the Frumwald say after he died?

Your honor, I'm unfit to stand trial.